So it all started like this.
In the summer this girl that I didn't know too well invited me to her
late birthday party, she seemed interesting to me so I went. I made a
good entrance and we had a good time. School started and throughout the
middle of september I found out I was her crush and she said she likes
me, I kept that in mind and we became closer and closer friends. I
didn't ask her out because, really I've never had a relationship
before. And it was like the second week of october and grad cruise was
coming up, I was gonna ask her and on the same day a guy asked her
already, she said yes to him. I asked who it was and told her "lol
ditch him and go with me :P" I felt lucky and maybe I was, she indeed
liked me better than him. There was a problem though, she can't say no to him if she already said
yes. So she cameup with something that I played along with, "I am going
out with her" so then it would look awkward for him. She asked if that
was alright and I was like, "Yeah, this is gonna work :)."
It just all
connected together so easy it was unimaginable, now all we needed to do
is hangout more, so I asked what she was doing on that next friday and
she was gonna hangout with some friends and get drunk a bit, I came
with, we smoked some hookah, and we drank. That night we slept
together, spooned a bit. Next morning when we went back to
her place, I felt this cue coming up that "I should probably kiss this
girl". Well I didn't, the cue came up and I missed it. I felt really
bad inside, but I told myself, if you want this first one to mean
something then do it another time. During the day when we were talking on msn, she was like "wow you loosened up so
much lastnight, I always thought you were a shy guy haha".
We hang out more the next week we
even went shopping for my haloween outfit. As haloween came and we had the
same event happen on friday, except we had more fun, more drunk, and we
even got a bed to ourselves. I figure "K this is definitly were the
first kiss should happen right?" we were in bed awake for 5 hours just
talking, I reached in for a kiss like 5 times, our lips were like an
inch apart, I figured at first she would complete that last inch since
I went the full 90%. I think I messed up, I wasnt looking hard enough
for that sign that maybe she wanted me to complete that last inch. Needless to say I never kissed her, I went a couple steps ahead and gave her a hickey because she wanted it, but in the end I just never kissed her and I feel even worse inside.
And this is where I'm lost, we had this relationship thing going for
like 3 weeks now and I haven't kissed her, yet I totally was in bed
with her twice. Today we were at our friends house and our friend she asked us
"are you guys even going out? I mean you guys slept together TWICE!"
when she asked that, I felt speechless, I looked at the girl I'm going
out with and had the face expression "are we?". When we left her house, I
thought about it a lot and I asked her what was her schedule like, and
asked do you want to see a movie, and she suggested, "hey right you wanted to
show me the Star Wars series" and I said "right that is very true, want
to see it at my place?" and we agreed to do it on thursday.
I should
have re-thought that, because there's really no cozy private place in
my house that we can sit together, except for my room but the only
place to sit would have to be my bed and the fact you can't sit on the
bed too long unless you lay on it.
I could change the plan and ask her out to maybe the movie theatre, or
maybe something else, although I'm not too big on the dinner date thing.
